The Start of Summer

As the semester came to a close this year I had no idea what I was going to do this summer.  I went through my regular options such as working a summer job and serving at my home church Calvary Chapel Old Bridge.  I was content with these options when an opportunity was presented to me at College.  I go to The Richard Stockton College of New Jersey, and am involved in two faith based ministries on campus.  One being Campus Crusade for Christ (or Cru) and the other being Stockton Christian Fellowship (or SCF).  At SCF is where I was offered this opportunity.  The man in charge of SCF is Pastor Ray Laird, he also pastors a church down in Long Beach Island, New Jersey (Island Baptist Church or IBC).  Every summer he offers an Internship in the children ministry to the students at SCF.  At first I said to myself "Children and me don't mix, the youngest group I could do is High School." And I turned down the internship without even knowing what it was other than children were involved.  About a week went by, and I felt the Holy Spirit directing my heart towards doing what I believed I was unable to do.  God works in funny ways.  I couldn't believe what I was about to do. Towards the end of April I asked P. Ray if there was still a spot open for the internship.  He told me there was and he encouraged me.  My doubts were something that the enemy (Satan, The Devil, The Evil One...you get the point) was using to hinder God's work in my life.  For the most part I believed I was unqualified to do any type of ministry.  When somethings broken what do we do with it...we put it on the shelf.  But in God's eyes if we are broken He will use us.  Something I'd heard but never seen any Christian do.  Even after I signed the application for the internship and was accepted to do it, friends, people who are men of God, said it wasn't right for me to do ministry in a leadership sense.  I do admit I've done some stupid things over the past year...things I regret, and I am suffering the consequences for, but I don't think God wants me to not do what's in His will because of the unforgivness of others toward me.  I was told by some people that, "...these things look good on a resume, but you have to answer to God...He doesn't care how good your resume is...it's about the heart."  I am at a point in my life where I do agree that somethings have to change.  I will persevere.  I start the internship in a week from Sunday.  My prayer for the summer is that God would stretch me and mold me into the man He wants me to be.  I have already stepped out of my comfort zone, stepped out in faith, and the only thing I have that's keeping me from going crazy with worry is knowing that God has me in His hands and he will never let go.  

God Bless,
Bobby